Night 1
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Indian Food, Too Full to MoveMike, Kyle, David and I meet up with Jordan at the Airbnb. It's sweeeet. Rooftop patio on top of a rooftop patio. It's a thing and I dig it. We crack open some beers and commiserate about the horror that is Donald Trump.
Time for food! Since Uber isn't allowed to operate here, we use the this-is-not-Uber-but-looks-exactly-like-Uber app called RideAustin to get to Clay Pit for Indian. The Jalapeno Cream Cheese Naan is amazing. I order the Paneer Korma (made with almond cashew pistachio cream garlic coconut sauce) that's also fantastic. Mike gets the Lamb Biryani with tasty rice. We eat until it hurts. I unbutton my pants and feel no shame. |
You Know When You Laugh So Hard You Pee a Little?
We get home and someone turns on Comedy Central. First it's Luis CK, then some guy I've never heard of but - holy shit. I'm laughing so hard I'm dying. Dying. I ate to much and it's hilarious and I'm rolling on the floor and I feel like I'm going to vomit. I haven't laughed this hard since Dove and I watched Monty Python and the Holy Grail, and that was - what - 10 years ago?
Day 1
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Food, Coffee and More WaitingUp next? Food trucks! I've got a buzz and want it all. We stop at a food truck park and I hop in line for The Mighty Cone. It's a long line but everyone says these cones are bomb. Then a good samaritan let's us all know, "It's a 30 minute wait after you place your order, and no one told me, so I thought I should tell you." A bunch of people leave the line. I stay, because it's a taco in a cone and I will wait.
I order the Monster Cone for obvious reasons. (Fried chicken shrimp and avocado crusted with almonds, sesame seeds, chili flakes, corn flakes, mango-jalapeno slaw, ancho sauce, I could keep going). It was good. Maybe not wait-for-45-minutes good, but my buzz says we like it. Next up is Uncle Billy's. I'm coming down from my buzz and in true ninny fashion can't force myself to drink any more. Mike orders me a vodka soda. I'm suuuuper annoying and realize after the fact that I don't want it. Luckily we have boys who will drink whatever. Pass 'er on down. Coffee time! Coffee coffee. We walk next door to Austin Java and everyone orders too much espresso. Mike's has something stupid like 16 shots. David doesn't drink coffee but orders the same. We worry for his health. (This wait, too, is so long. We're starting to see a trend). On the way out, we see a guy getting wheeled out of Uncle Billy's on a stretcher. He gives us a drunken "How you doin?" Splendid, jolly drunk man, and thanks for asking. |
The Best Restaurant of All Time
Our dinner reservation is at Emmer & Rye. We walk in and feel a little apprehensive. It's a nice place and we're not so great at the "inside voice" thing. Also, we thought it was dim sum, but apparently the dim sum's cart's wheels don't work on the patio outside.
Turns out, none of that matters. This ends up being the most fun and the best food we've had. Ever. Mike's proclamation: "This might be my new favorite restaurant." It's all the burnt stuff. Burnt carrots, burnt broccoli, all served in tiny portions. We find this hilarious. Do you have any more burnt food? No? Can you just burn the rest of our food then? The waitress doesn't know what to do with us. That, plus Kyle with his bib and only wanting sparkling water, plus Mike eating his mescal lemon like a monster, plus everything being laughably small. Oh Austin, you've done it.
We bar hop on Rainier Street, but I'm not drinking so I mostly listen. Soon, we're heading towards home to Mezcaleria Tobala - it's a really neat mescal bar with the creepiest clown/manaquin/zombie thing downstairs. Kyle is not okay with it. NOT. OK. He has a slight freak out because he has to walk past the thing to get to the bathroom. Sorry buddy, not backing you up on this one.
Mike ends the night by ordering late night food at Thai-Kun, the food truck beside the bar. I take a bite. Holy hell. It's spicy. But whatever because I go for another. We pass it around and agree that we will regret this later.
Turns out, none of that matters. This ends up being the most fun and the best food we've had. Ever. Mike's proclamation: "This might be my new favorite restaurant." It's all the burnt stuff. Burnt carrots, burnt broccoli, all served in tiny portions. We find this hilarious. Do you have any more burnt food? No? Can you just burn the rest of our food then? The waitress doesn't know what to do with us. That, plus Kyle with his bib and only wanting sparkling water, plus Mike eating his mescal lemon like a monster, plus everything being laughably small. Oh Austin, you've done it.
We bar hop on Rainier Street, but I'm not drinking so I mostly listen. Soon, we're heading towards home to Mezcaleria Tobala - it's a really neat mescal bar with the creepiest clown/manaquin/zombie thing downstairs. Kyle is not okay with it. NOT. OK. He has a slight freak out because he has to walk past the thing to get to the bathroom. Sorry buddy, not backing you up on this one.
Mike ends the night by ordering late night food at Thai-Kun, the food truck beside the bar. I take a bite. Holy hell. It's spicy. But whatever because I go for another. We pass it around and agree that we will regret this later.
Day 2
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Boot 'n...Rally?
Or, well, I don't think anyone puked, but you get the point. We grab dinner at the vegan restaurant (because apparently we're done with meat) called Counter Culture. I don't eat anything because I couldn't fit any more food in me if I tried.
Our Favorite Memories
Mike: "Burnt dinner." Obviously.
For me, it was the same! I laughed like a child the entire time.
For me, it was the same! I laughed like a child the entire time.